Saturday, August 1, 2015

Cracked Flash: Year 1, Week 6

It's always such a pleasure. Remember how you tried to kill me--
Take a looksy through the full rules if you haven't already!

Judges This Week: Rin and Mars

Word count: 300 max

How: Submit your stories as a comment to this post, along with your name, word count, and title (and Twitter handle or blog if you've got 'em!). Only one entry per person.

Deadline: Midnight tonight, PDT!

Results announced: Next Wednesday!

Remember: The prompt can be mutilated, but not beyond recognition.

"Oh, no. We brought the wrong kid."
"You're kidding me."

Actually, it's at midnight, but details.


  1. Sometimes Holidays Really Get Your Goat

    300 words


    “Oh no, we brought the wrong kid.”

    “You’re kidding me.”

    The small goat continued to chew on Dai’s shoe, a picture of innocence.

    Will looked at the photo and then back at the contented creature. “Are you sure? I mean … cloven hooves, check, stubby horns, check.”

    “Nah, he’s too cute to be the spawn of the devil,” said Dai.

    “Come on, Dai,” said Will. “Remember what He said if we lost His kid. Said He’d roast us slowly on a spit and serve us up at the Family BBQ.”

    “Back up the mountain it is then,” said Dai. “Better make sure we look for the Mark this time. And I’ll check the numbers, after that little 999 incident last year. His Infernal Majesty wasn’t best pleased about the Fire Brigade extinguishing his holiday pit.”

    “Gwen’s going to have my guts for garters if I’m late again,” Will muttered as they set off. “Do you think that once we’ve found him we should give up this devil worship lark? I mean all it’s done is play ‘avoc with me knees and don’t get me started on my piles …”

    “Why does he keep coming back here?” interrupted Dai.

    “Says it’s the one place they can get in touch with their inner caprine.”


    Their voices faded as they retraced their steps grabbing every goat they passed. It was going to be a long night.

    “Now that wasn’t very nice,” said a deep voice. Two red eyes rested on the kid they’d left behind.

    “No, it wasn’t,” chuckled the youngster. “But you know there’s something about these family holidays that brings out the devil in me.”

    Their laughter resounded with a crack across the valleys, scattering the livestock far and wide. And for Dai and Will the night stretched even longer.

  2. Wonderful--great take on the prompt Steph!

    1. Thank you, currently with mother-in-law in Wales. Think the air's affecting me 🐏🐉

    2. Blog is not showing my icons, kept it topical with sheep and dragons but it got lost in translation!

  3. Changeling Duty

    297 words

    “Oh no. We brought the wrong kid.”
    “You’re kidding me.”
    “No, really. Look. He’s too big to be a baby.”
    Sephira glanced at the bundle of blankets on the grass, anxiously twisting her silver-green hair between her fingers. She had to admit it had been difficult to fly whilst carrying it, but…
    “Deenan, you told me you had everything checked out. You said that was the right house! We already put the changeling in!”
    Deenan scratched his long, pointed ears, his fine features red with embarrassment. “I’m sorry. This is only my second time doing this, okay? Changeling duty isn’t easy.”
    “You’re telling me! I waited forever for this and now my partner just bungled my first job!”
    Just then, they heard a yawn and a soft rustling behind them. Sephira’s heart turned cold. Deenan’s purple eyes widened and he trembled. Changeling duty was not known to be dangerous to faeries, since they usually handle babies, but an older kid was another story altogether.
    “Ooh, new toys!”
    Sephira tried to fly away, but strong little fingers grabbed her wings. She struggled, calling for Deenan, but he was caught in the kids’ other hand!
    A dewy blue eye peered down at Sephira and a drop of drool from a toothy grin fell on her face.
    “Ew!” she exclaimed as she tried to wiggle free. “Deenan, talk to it! Do something! This is all your fault!”
    “Human child! Let go of us at once! We do not belong in your realm!” Deenan shouted wobbly as the child shook him about.
    Sephira rolled her eyes. “I don’t think it understands Faerie court talk, genius.”
    The kid began walking back towards the house, still holding the faeries. Sephira sighed; what was worse, a scolding from Oberon or playtime with a toddler?

    1. Great take. I was holding my breath for a minute thinking they were going to be chewed in the usual toddler way!